To Smell Or Not to Smell?

As most of you know, I'm an accountant. I work at a firm in new yawk.

One of the perks of my job is not having to worry about good personal hygiene. There's no mention of it in the employee manual. So, if I want to wear the same underwear for several weeks at a time, that's not a problem.

In this vein, the office does NOT engage a cleaning service. If good personal hygiene is unimportant to you, why bother?

This leads me to the mens' room where the concept of a disinfectant seems alien. Some of these guys might not be the best accountants because there talent lies in other areas. Unfortunately, there are no jobs (at least that I'm aware) that compensate for these talents.

When you can set off a sprinkler system without the benefit of a match, that says something to me.

Some of these guys need to be precluded from eating certain foods during office hours. I guess that w/b true if people cared about good personal hygiene. But, if you don't.....

As my rise to the top in the accounting profession has been stultified, I'm wondering if I'm not disgusting enough. I wonder if there is a continuing professional education "Good Personal Hygiene for Accountants- Myth and Reality."

Clearly, I need to be more disgusting. How can I be more disgusting in my office and show my boss that I'm ready to move to the next level?

Any help is greatly appreciated